#miju writes

[skz-sage]

skz + sage 5star moments (maknae line)

a/n: my apolo cheese for being absent. i do really want to continue writing for sage! i have so many ideas. as always, any requests are welcome! please leave them in my ask box :) if i get enough love i MIGHT do lalalala era version

jisung

jisung and sage do a vlog together so sages little series where she posts vlogs every few weeks. this days guest was jisung. every time you put these two together it’s absolute mayhem. literally in every video with jisung and sage they’re giggling, screaming laughing, it’s always happy-going with them. in this vlog it shows them going to practice, the convenience store and to the park. one of the highlights in this vlog is sage and jisung walking into the store and sage says “it’s on me, get whatever.” you can immediately see the sparkle in jisung’s eyes eyes. in subtitles she put “princess peter han~”. you can tell sage was getting worried the more and more jisung added things to the basket. she waited a little more to say “hey! i’m not made of money!” she scolded him. which made him laugh. you could tell he was doing it to mess with her. it didn’t matter because at the end they had a romantic picnic at the park with their snacks.

felix

this moment consist of felix and sage getting their makeup done next to each other. they were the last two to have their makeup done. because sage is a girl, her makeup takes a little longer than the rest of the boys. felix has this cute thing where when they’re getting their makeup done next to each other, felix will stay behind and talk sages ear off. sage took a time-lapse type of video, recording felix just talking, doing nothing just annoying miju. all she really did was nod and make small replies. it’s not that she didn’t like felix doing this, it just who sage is. she could be so interested in what you’re saying but she’ll give half-assed replies. minho gets on her ass a lot for it. she later posted onto her personal instagram the video and pictures she took of him next to her. she captioned it “yongbok? more like yongboring 😒”

seungmin

for this specific part of the mv, sage had to act surprised. for an odd reason it took sage a while to get it right. of course, seungmin found it soooo amusing. just from him staring at him with a grin, she could tell exactly what was going on in his head. this would go in a compilation of “seungmin staring at sage for 30 minutes”. oh he was evil, but she loved him. the camera man will go over to seungmin and he’s laugh to the camera, mocking sage’s attempts to act shocked. “she’s endearing.. but a little stupid.” this made stays be like “HUH?? JESUS HES SO MEAN TO HER”, but no this is just how sage and seungmin joke around. they’re brutal towards each other. later on when it was seungmin on camera and sage watching, she shook her head and sighed. “he’s really pretty, stay. but he’s horrible towards me. you should always love me more.” she joked with a straight face towards the camera.

jeongin

in the 5star concept pics, jeongin and sage were paired together. the visuals they gave were astronauts, intergalactic, out of the world. it had the members talking out it for weeks. went from “she’s so gorgeous!” to “miju where did the years go? you’re all grown up!” which she hears often… it drives her crazy. in the dressing room, jeongin left behind an expensive silver necklace. with a note from jeongin saying “for miju~ ♡”. of course jeongin checked with staff to make sure she can wear it during the photoshoot. of course she gave her best visuals in the photoshoot, as she always does. after the shoot her and jeongin went out to restaurant and sage still had the necklace on. later jeongin would post on his instagram a picture of his kiss-stained cheek and the culprit? son miju.

[strixcattus]

Conlang Year Days 121–125

(of word-formation and the tragic consequences thereof)

Been a little distracted and a little slow on the Conlang Year prompts, but I've got the making of some word-formation strategies and a few new words to show for them.

Compounds

Compounds are head-initial, like the rest of Conlang tends to be. Currently the only compounds I'm considering are Verb-Noun and Noun-Noun, but I'm unsure if I'm dedicated to the idea of not having either of Noun-Verb and Verb-Verb compounds.

A few of the compounds I've been experimenting with (currently they're being compounded before any sound changes take effect, though that only matters for the first—don't know if I'll keep that or change it):

Keniozi (keni+lozi, path+pack animal): Migration path Tinomeki (tino+meki, pathogen+nose): Common cold Mijujuo (miju+juo, sleep+sun): Nap

(Which I suppose means I need to reformulate my word for "monarch," since it's a head-final compound of "world" and "person" that got fused a little more than most. So instead of zeniza, it'd be... sizaine? Doesn't roll off the tongue nearly as much. I wonder if I can rationalize the odd ordering away...)

Derivations

I don't have any illusions that I've got a full battery of derivations at this time, but I've been spinning up some ideas:

A new verb lanu (I'm planning to work out an irregular conjugation table for it, but haven't done so yet) which translates to "do" and is kind of a companion to nai—where nai is used to describe basically any passive state of being, lanu is used for any actions that are heavily associated with nouns. For instance—

...do I not have an example for this?

...do I not have any existing nouns that would make sense as an example for this?

...

...oh, here's one. I suppose.

For instance: Lanu... ne ki dai (no lijaiza). Lit. "do tongue (with someone)." As in. Make out (with someone). Not sure if that would be slang or a more formal term. It's not as though I expected that to be a formally-defined construction in any conlang of mine.

On to... other topics, I decided to take the system I used for indefinite pronouns—separate suffixes for people and things—and turn them into a pair of Verb->Noun derivational suffixes:

-iza: Turns a verb into a noun meaning "person who does that verb" -uli/-oli: Turns a verb into a noun meaning "object used in the performance of that verb"

Some examples (not all of which will necessarily make it into the dictionary, but I wanted to test the suffixes with as many different verbs as I could):

Gako: Speak Gakoiza: Speaker Gakouli: Microphone

Paliso: Copy Palisoiza: Copy-artist (which could mean anything from someone who hand-copies manuscripts to an art forger) Palisouli: Copy machine/photocopier

Mida: Lie (tell a falsehood) Midaiza: Liar Midaoli: Lie (falsehood)

Zasi: Repair Zasiza: Repairman Zasioli: Tool (debatable if it'll make it into the dictionary)

Nasu: Write Nasuiza: Writer Nasuli: Stationery (debatable if it'll make it into the dictionary)

(The latter suffix is only rendered as -oli if -uli can't attach seamlessly onto the verb, as in midaoli and zasioli (there are no au or iu diphthongs). -iza would never have that problem, since all vowels that aren't already i can begin a diphthong ending in i. In the case that a verb ends in a diphthong already (couldn't find any good examples), the suffix would replace the second vowel sound of the diphthong.)

(For a verb ending in e (no eu or eo diphthong)... I'm not sure how -uli would work. Problem for future me.)

[wave2love]

KARMA BSF 😓😓 writing an article for rocket rn and i cant think of any like made up ent company names…… KARMA ENTERTAINMENT fr 😊 Help idk. apart from that its ac going p well im excited 😦

make it karma ent fr... idk i'm not good @ names.. like idk miju ent or smt.......... DONT ask me how i came up w that cz idk

[all-cf-me]

Seth acts wounded, as if Miju's comment lands with a thud in his chest like an arrow... as if he's not completely fucking right. He loves working with an arsenal of whip-smart talents with faces to match their intellect, but sometimes it's easier to be the most business-literate guy in the room.

"My devilish good looks aside, you get to read anything I write up, and I'm hurt that you'd suggest otherwise." Seth attempts to reassure him - certainly not promising that he won't add any strange terms into the contract, simply offering that Miju will have a chance to catch them. "My charm doesn't do my business, it just opens the door. But I bet you know all about that, huh?"

"Mm. Good eye. No end of ochre when you live in a sandy hellscape." Which suits Miju perfectly fine. Not the sandy hellscape, but the availability of ochre pigment is a convenience. He looks appreciatively at Seth's business card, turning it over in his fingers; very swish. He appreciates the sensory memory upon it, the faint scent of Seth's cologne lingering. Deliberate or not, it will ensure that the memory of this visit stays even once he departs.

Slipping it into his pocket, he gives Seth an amused look, brows raised as if to ask really? "You look exactly the type to sneak shit into contracts. You know full well that you do. You're just hoping you're charming enough I'll either not mind, or not notice. And I'm sure it works a treat on plenty of people, too." There's sort of a compliment in there, maybe. If you squint.

[mccarthymolly]

economic experiments n alt gurus, wt,uh,ni,uh,wt,no,u,h

The adult who says they understand b ih no wt no uh no uh no uh tell yh uh no uh

Jdg b idk,uh ok,uh dk, b n yh uh okhmuh no uh yh,

Wt eh lose, abt nj n abuse n sth n told n start n memory n henry new n person n uh dk,uh,yng,uh,gd n bd,uh, i think tht yng so yrs of confusion, y delay w col, gr house nt nded, grpa hug,ok,uhyhuh,no,uh,no,yh,ww,uh,no,dk,uh,ok,ww,wdnt say bye, wd say gone, gr no, envi,uh,yh okhmuj,yh,ww,uh,ok hm uh,no,ih,dk,uh,o k kuh,no,hh,

Gd ok eh yh uh no yh uh no wt uh no wt yh uh ww uh okjmuj sth yh uh no wt uh context no uh man uh no ,ppl,mybe,uh dk,uh,mybe,yh gd,uh ok,yh,uh,kyh,uh,no,yh,uh,dk,gv up, week is dep n wknd isnt,idk,uh,no,hate knwing day,y,uh,dk,uh,rarely am a day off or unsure,sad,oo k hm un,yh,u,hm,o,j,j,great,uh, ok umu h, o

Ok uh muhhuko

Presenting writing in stage, b wr, acted w persona tm char, ujkuj b act gen hm i

Okhmuhwtuh okhmuhwtujo lhm ww uh okhmuh wt uhkhk fr this? Hksuajoakwjzjz. Wt? Ol hm ushs wt uhokjmuj no uh ook hm I hmsisush okhkuh mo uh wt uhokhmuj no uh h k u kokhjuh mo no uh okhmuh no uh okhmuh no uh okhmujiuhyhuh ok kjkjmnujnyhuhoknmo

Pitch wt no,hlp,uh,no,wt,uh,no uh no yh uh no y uh no wt,uh,both nt want n cant, both, y u bad conceptualization, doubt me no mttr wt lk i cant exist, idkh,m,uh,,k,o

More help no uh khmuhmouh no no uh okhmuh no yh uh hmkhkuuh ok see uh no yh uh hmkjmuhkouh et hmuhh

Khmuhwwuhmnouhnkujkjjjjmjnohki

Okhmuhyhuh okhmuh ww okhmuh yh uh khmujokj hm uh prsn no hk uj

Act i lk mr, okhmuhyhuh no yh sth ww conservtry, dk, phil ed, no, okhmuh wtdo, js say, hmij uh hu no uh okjuh lec uh no uh shr yh uh ok hm uh tmstmp ww ok hm ujjk

Pay dk yh uh no okhmuhhn yh uh okhmuno uh yh uh okhmuh dk ww mybe uhookhm uhno I'm uh hmuhku ok yh uh kh my u hm k nno yh uh oh I'm

Fd dk b hw uh oh mupjujmouh I no b dk uh khmuh, exp, yh, o hmu in ouh dk uh ha okhmuh no uh wt uh ok jmuh

Okyhuhokhmuhnouh ok no uh inflame ish,h,mu,h,n,o,uh,yh,uh,ok,hmuh,wt,uh,no,uh,okhmuj,ki,j,

All the arts,uh,no,uh,y, business cul to like goals, commit, clr,uh,yh,no,uh,okmujmouh,yh,,uh,okkh k uh either bit or informal

Them wb dk,uj,,ok,o,u,k,o,j,i,y,o,k,k, k, n,n

,uj,,j,,i,p,pk k j, k ok look j uh o kokonmoijk wt y uh ojij uh n ko moiujojuk y uh no uh o k j o j

Time, per, nt agn,yh,no uh dk,uh,nooo,uh,okhmuh,read,b dk,uh,rd,uh, ok hmuh,yh,uh,no,uh,wt,uh,okh mu u,nouh,no,uh,nt less frml,wt,uh,uh,no,

N,o,i miju j o,u,huh,uj,wt,uh,o,k,u,n,j,,mn,u

Ww no fst, gd,h mk ijw yh k um no kok ku uh juk no uh o ku uni uh. Hmuh jo uh ki jo

Ideaoskhmuj,mo,yh,uh,no,

Knowyuhyhuh j i,j,u,j

[kalosstarters]

a short-ish 2 episode recap of mpm03 and 04:

03:

Ah, Cilan, our favorite everything-sommelier!! Was so good to see him again and hear his dramatic lines. One of my favorite moments was him doing a tasting time with Misty and Psyduck, I love the bond those two have gotten since their challenging times in early OS. And ha, turns out Cilan and Brocko only found out now they’re both friends of Ash even tho they’ve been hanging out a lot. Ash, do you like ever call or write your friends?? (Don’t take me too seriously, btw) One of the minor ‘nitpickings’ I have towards that episode is that I doubt Brock would have given up his doctor training for a girl (I definitely imagine him going back to doing that once MPM is over), if anything you’d think that the Joys around him would motivate him to finish that training. The plot itself wasn’t anything mindblowing to me but it was a nice touch that Brock himself was able to break the illusion. Oh and his reaction to finding out that his newest crush had a boyfriend was a callback to that Professor Ivy situation in OS. Not gonna lie, I got a bit sad when Cilan said his ‘besto wishu’ in the end because this was quite likely the last time we see him (at least with a voice role), but overall it was a nice episode and it was wonderful to see all 3 of those companions together.

04: 

A pretty ‘basic’ story for a pokeani episode, but it still showed wonderfully the best sides of Ash. His refusal to give up, his selflessness and his care for those that many others would have given up on already. One of my favorite moments in this episode was Brock and Misty acknowledging that ‘this side of him hasn’t changed at all’ even tho a lot of time has passed (at least for us viewers :P). Also, loved seeing Gaogaen/incineroar (and obviously talonflame and miiijumiiju too) in this ep, everything that reminds me of Alola makes me :’) Hmm, what else, the bellsprout in the end and miju telling the beartic to try to form the shell were sweet. It was also good tr wasn’t in this episode, as they weren’t really needed.

Am excited to see the og starter trio next week, this series sure is an OS love fest (and I’m not complaining, since I am an OS fan)

[waynedunlaptheorgandonor]

Rereading MIJU and Daryl explaining to Carol’s stomach how to gut a deer is still the best.

lmfao i forgot about that. fun fact, when i was writing that, i texted my partner and was like "is this how you skin a deer?" and he was like "i mean, ig, why?" and i said "don't worry about it"

good times

[x-wearethefuture-x]

@unfinishedjulyrain

It had been nearly 6 years. 6 years apart and yet she still sometimes wondered how he was doing. She’d go out of her way to watch videos of his boxing matches sometimes, just to see him. Some small connection to a past she knew she should have let go of. But it was hard to let go entirely when Miju looked so much more like her father than like her mother.

But now wasn’t the time to think of these things. She had work to focus on, if just for another half hour. Then she could head home, see her daughter, and let the babysitter off the hook for the night. She hated having to let someone else take care of her daughter after school, even if it was only for a few hours. Miju had started asking about her father, about why he wasn’t around, and now Mina felt like she was leaving her daughter behind, too. Not that Jayson had had much of a choice in the matter. But then again, neither did Mina. Not then, knowing she could have ruined his life by staying with him, and not now when she had to do her job to ensure that she and her daughter had enough money to not only survive, but for Miju to have a happy life. 

“Mina-” She lifted her head, looked up at the lead nurse, “When you’re finished with that, there’s a patient in room 304. Nothing serious, he just needs a bit of patching up then he can be on his way.” The chart was placed on the counter in front of her and Mina placed a hand on it, pulled it closer, but did not yet bother looking it over. When she finished filling out the chart she was working on, she put it in its place for the doctor then took the new one without bothering to read it just yet- she could do so when she was in the room.

“304, 304, 304...” She muttered to herself walking up the short hallway, watching the room numbers pass her by until she was at the correct one. She opened the door, walked inside... and immediately almost dropped the clipboard. 

Kang Jisung.

If she’d just bothered to read the name on the chart before coming in, she could have prepared herself better. She might not have looked so wide eyed and shocked. But the surprise quickly wore off as she looked down at his chart- it made sense that someone in his line of work would end up here from time to time with some cute and scrapes to be tended to. In fact, she should be more surprised that she hadn’t been assigned to patch him up before.

“I’m sorry... do you want... I mean, if you’d like a different nurse...” If he was fine with her treating his wounds, then she’d stick around and do it. It was the least she could offer after what she’d done to the poor guy. But if he didn’t feel comfortable with her, she’d understand. She wanted him to have the option. He was the patient, after all, and she was just the nurse trying to do her job, “Would you like me to get someone else?”

[mijukaze]

Some stuffs

[wearevillaneve]

Sandra Oh is a LOSER and I have receipts.

Sandra Oh has been nominated 13 times for an Emmy Award and she has not won 13 times. Damn, gurl. What seems to be the problem here? You mean to tell me you weren't good enough not once, not twice, not thrice, not a dozen times, but THIRTEEN times?

Sorry, baby. It's all true. How do you spell "loser?" You spell it S-A-N-D-R-A-O-H. Okay, here's the thing. I'm only a few more weeks/days/hours/minutes/seconds from pulling the plug on WeAreVillaneve across every social media platform and since the show is dead, over, and buried, how much longer am I supposed to carry on? Gurl, please!

I'm all done with this "Yes, someone else was better than Sandra Oh for the 13th time, but oh well the writing wasn't that good and Zendaya was really good in Euphoria" bullshit.

Hey! Wasn't I supposed to be the star? WTF? Why are you smirking, Jodie, huh?

Sandra Oh has been nominated for an Emmy award 13 times and she has lost 13 times. Eleven times to a White woman and two times to a Black biracial woman and that is all well and good, but it is not. It really is not.

Sandra can style n' profile on the carpet and blow up social media by showing up rocking that Prince-inspired PURPLE in all her fierceness and ferocity, but when she actually steps inside, takes her seat, and sits quietly for the next three to four hours of jokes falling flat, commercial breaks, and categories she doesn't give a single shit about until they FINALLY get to Best Actress in A Drama and the actual award we tuned in to see, and once again loses because Someone Not Named Sandra Oh just oh-so happened to give a better performance than her it doesn't matter if their name is Claire Foy, Blythe Danner (x2), Katherine Heigel, Dianne Wiest, Jane Lynch, Zendaya (x2), Jodie Comer or Cherry "Who?" Jones.

All that matters is their name isn't Sandra Miju Oh. So yes, I AM blaming Sandra's 13th loss upon the fact that even White Liberal AF Hollywood is STILL located in Racist AF Amerikka and the fact is Sandra Oh is still too much of a badass, too unapologetic, too 50+, and too damn It's An Honor Just To Be Asian woman, and the Emmys ain't wit' it. Don't want to piss off those conservative corporations that buy up ad space on television and own movie studios or China by giving the Korean American Canadian her long-goddamn-overdue Emmy.

She can wait, right? Asian don't raisin, amirite?

Sandra Oh stood in the middle of the street in Pittsburgh after Asians had been targeted in Atlanta and across the U.S. and said I AM PROUD TO BE ASIAN AND I BELONG HERE and the Queen said it with her whole entire chest and damn whether or not White Liberal Hollywood was on board yet or not. Sandra spoke out when it would have been easier to not speak up.

Maybe that came back to bite her. Maybe it didn't. Maybe something else entirely, but I'm not going to treat Sandra being stubbed for the 13th and for all four seasons of Killing Eve as business-as-usual/somebody was better and ermigawd Zendaya is incredible!!!

Which she is. But is Zendaya and all the many other not-Sandras so much better than Sandra Oh? Sorry, but not sorry baby. Sandra Got Snubbed I give not one shit if Variety, The Hollywood Reporter, Deadline, Nikki Swift, the entire Killing Eve fandom in general, or you specifically agree with me or not.

Sandra Oh is Too Proud/Too Asian for Hollywood and that is fact and that is the truth. That's the truth and this 13th loss is the proof of it. I'm right and you're wrong and that's it. NOBODY loses thirteen damn times and it's just an unhappy coincidence. Don't be stupid or play me and Sandra like we are. We know what the Emmy wants and what it does not want to do is give Sandra Oh her Emmy.

So, roll up your excuses and do it any way you wanna but at the end of the day Sandra Oh was snubbed and I give not a single shit if Variety, The Hollywood Reporter, Deadline, Nikki Swift, and the entire Killing Eve fandom agree with me or not. Facts are facts, fam, and the facts are Sandra got screwed.

AGAIN.

Disagree all you want. I'm okay because reasonable people can disagree reasonably But then it's on you to show me where I'm wrong.

[gh0stbra1nz]

my thoughts on aadsig ep 11 + overall

this episode was probably one of my favourites. the growth and the handling of emotions were done so well and everyone’s story has actually already reached a satisfying ending, even if it’s only the penultimate episode. genuinely one of the best concluded dramas － no loose ends, no character forgotten and no change too abrupt. as always the show hit very close to home, what with the father claiming that everyone looks down on him and the violent rage that follows (though when we’d told our father he’s delusional we ended up very differently from jun lol), with his reaction to being exposed (mine was only threatened once with a call to the police but the way the father in the drama handled it was so similar it struck me). 

jun’s growth is possibly the most satisfying, realistic and relatable for me. it was hard for him to stand up for himself and even harder to truly cut himself off from the pain that had made home in him for years, because at that point it really is a part of you and feels as though it shaped you into who you’ve become － it’s as though without it you are less than the nothing you already were. it’s something i still struggle with regarding this particular part of my life and seeing jun going through it was emotional, to say the least. 

the friendship in this show! i genuinely love how they portray relationships of all types. though the drama in itself wasn’t spectacular i do think the writing for each character’s personality and how they interact with one another was done really well.

in the end however the relationship between sobin and jun still feels incredibly dry romantically to me. their interactions just come off as friendly in my eyes and their playful flirting as awkward. i genuinely cannot see them as a couple and don’t think i ever will － and not solely because they wrote such a perfect relationship between soohyun and jun. frankly, sobin and jun just don’t click to me, at least.

on the other hand, soohyun and jun. i’ve talked a fair bit about why i love their dynamic and why i truly believe that they should have ended up together. honestly, throughout the majority of the show it felt as though the director and writer wanted to portray them as love interests for each other (or just, y’know, the usual queerbaiting stuff ig). the way scenes were cut/shot, the lingering stares, the subtle and not-so-subtle acts of affection and emphasis on their every interaction － loosely speaking, they were the two characters who interacted the most in the whole show, so obviously they would feel to have the most chemistry and sound base for a relationship; because they’ve grown accustomed to one another, they’ve grown attached to one another, they’ve become so comfortable that jun opens up to soohyun about something as personal as his abuse, whilst sobin mostly keeps her emotional (and literal, at times when the presence of both was needed even, which i found questionable on her part as jun’s supposed partner) distance from jun, both of her own volition and the latter’s. 

it was so interesting to see how soohyun and jun balanced each other out and what was incredibly validating of this was in today’s episode, when they were sitting on that bench and directly saying how they couldn’t imagine not having met each other. it’s come to the point that they truly can’t be without the other and whilst jun and sobin talk about missing each other a lot etc, it’s almost never shown, which makes it harder for me as a viewer to believe it when jun and hyun actually show their need for closeness and a genuine interest in the other. 

in the end, sobin felt more like a buffer of sorts to keep things heteronormative because － and i mean this objectively － her role in the story and growth of the characters was quite literally non-existent. her character brought about minimal change for that of a main which solidifies the idea in my mind that she was there to keep things straight and that’s it. if we were to imagine the show without her, honestly not much changes? there are no effects on jun or hyun who are fellow mains － actually, even just skipping her existing scenes when watching the show is enough to give base to my opinion on her writing. even if soohyun and jun wouldn’t be canonically paired up in the end in a version without her, their interactions and dynamic are so layered with romanticism that it’d be an unavoidable thought in the viewer’s mind and an inevitable conclusion that they do, at least, feel something for each other. the second official version of the show's poster wouldn't help either. sobin felt very much to be there merely to put some distance between canon and this idea.

this is not to shit on sobin but rather how she was written. initially i was interested in her story and how it would entangle with the others, but half way through or so she reached a peak and fell flat, no longer having the mystery of her full story to carry her left her character with no purpose and to serve only as a filler. if they had to write her as jun’s partner i wish they’d put more thought and effort into how the two, and particularly she, behaved with who she supposedly loved, because whilst once we learned all of hyun’s story his presence remained fundemental to the plot and jun’s character － not to mention he himself keeps changing for the better － sobin doesn’t carry any weight in the storyline, nor does she affect the characters or continue her road to growing. in all, it seemed as though her character － of the three mains － was the one that underwent the least transformation.

as for soohyun, i know nothing about the manhwa except for the fact that he’s the gay character in it. in the drama, so far, unless they decide to abruptly shove miju or youngran (?) in his face and we dismiss that brief scene of him putting his finger down when asked if he liked one of the girls, he has actually never truly shown romantic interest in anyone (besides jun but that’s my opinion lmao). even if they erased his sexuality (despite the fact that this show was going for the air of progression and being true to one’s self) they at least － so far － haven’t forced him with a woman which is something small to appreciate (the bar is low). 

in the end i’m happy i was queerbaited into watching this drama because, whilst not perfect, it resonated with me a lot and both hyun and jun have come to mean a lot to me as characters. it was realistic and respectful in portraying trauma and mental health issues which i really appreciated. 

[hyunjinspark]

I just realized that Miju from Only Fools is such an underrated character :(( she's so nice and that she knew yn and hyun would be perfect together even since hs ☹️

-🌼

she is !! she was so fun to write too :( she was also the only one who was there during both times, to understand what yn was going through regarding hyun 🥺☹️

[zydia]

this is just a random idea that popped up into my mind and it probably will clash with next weeks ep but honestly i just need this soohyun x youngran ship to SAIL. youngran is literally the bestest girl and she deserves him and please please please let them be endgame. also i cant find any fic about them so this is also just to satisfy myself and anyone out there who feels like me :”) also this is my first fic so please excuse my writing.

It’s a beautiful night, Young-ran thinks, as a light breeze slips through her hair. Their impromptu trip has been wonderful thus far - picturesque sceneries, clement weather and genuine relationships formed with beautiful people. Though she isn’t sure if Soo-hyun would be happy to hear her calling him beautiful. Or maybe he wouldn’t care at all. Either way, it didn’t matter. It was a beautiful night.

And of course, as all trips mandated, heart-to-heart conversations were not to be forgotten. So she isn’t too surprised when So-bin approaches her during her little moment at the railings as the peak of their little getaway peacefully falls to a plateau after a long day of excitement. Perhaps she could also sensed the inevitable question that had been looming over her junior’s head, that when So-bin finally turns to asks, she doesn’t flinch nor break her gaze away from the scenery in front of her.

“Why won’t you confess?”

Though So-bin does not mention any name, there is no question as to whom she was referring to. She had shared once about the cactus thorn in her heart and there is only one person that she constantly worries about and showers with unconditional care and support. Thus, to So-bin’s question, she answers without an ounce of hesitation.

“Because that’s not what he needs.”

So-bin replies with a soft word of confusion and she takes the chance to explain it further.

“He is a person who lives with lots of burden on his shoulders. Each day is a struggle for him. Yet, he doesn’t accepts help when given because he thinks that he lacks the luxury of time and capability to return the favour.” She muses as she recalls about the time she had confronted him at the construction site with her heels in hand.

“Favours already burdens him, what more a relationship. Confessing to him would just be a selfish act of my own - a selfish want for him to know how I feel and to return my affections. But what he needs is a friend whom he knows is behind him through it all. Not an admirer or a girlfriend.”

A veil of silence envelopes them as her words disappears into the crisp air of the night and it takes about a minute before So-bin asks another question.

“What if another girl comes along and snatches him away?”

Laughing airily at So-bin’s words, she replies. “Snatch? He isn’t mine to begin with and he isn’t an item.” To which So-bin splutters that it wasn’t her intention to imply that, causing her to laugh even harder at So-bin’s flustered face.

“I’m joking. You’re so cute.” She ruffles So-bin’s hair and the latter gives a small whine. The atmosphere settles as they turn to gaze at the scenery together this time and she continues their conversation.

“Like I said the last time - if he likes someone else, I will let him follow his heart. Because more than anything, my wish is for him to be happy. And before anything else, I am his friend and his greatest supporter.”

Turning to lean on her side, she faces So-bin and continues resolutely. “That’s why if Mi-ju is the one who can make him happy, I will support them both.”

A moment of staring ensues before So-bin breaks into a smile and repeats her reply at the birthday party.

“You are so cool Young-ran.”

“I know.” She winks as she returns back to her playful self.

Slinging an arm around So-bin, she walks them back to their little camp, unbeknownst to them that Soo-hyun had been around the corner the entire time.

i know youngran also told miju that she didnt confess because she couldnt find the right time, but honestly i feel that this answer also fits her better. but yes thank you for reading till the end! idk if i will have another inspiration to continue this scenario hehehehe. once again, writers, please let this ship sail. tysm.

[ajwamiju-archives]

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Hello and welcome to my blog! It's currently very bland and this looks like shit but I'm slowly turning it into a theme I swear! I'll definitely edit as I go.

! IMPORTANT NOTE ! : I'm currently in my second semester of college and last semester didn't go as smoothly as I hoped, so I will try to make a set schedule to follow. I'm still fucked over and can barely produce anything, but, I am picking up the pace after a year-long break by trying to finish commission samples. Yes, I am struggling, yes, I need money, and yes, if I'm desperate enough, I might just go on and find myself a sugar daddy or mommy.

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[moonxvxsun]

you were only seventeen

TW: implied sexual abuse, emeto

This is my first story and I'm introducing you to my very first OC's. I would absolutely die (in a good way) if you guys asked me questions about them and wanted to get to know them better.

But without further ado, I'd like to introduce you to my OC's.

Samara Ryder and her partner Cordelia Jones

Cordelia was sitting in her shared apartment with their girlfriend Samara, everything was dark, they had all of the lights off. The only thing that gave away that they were home, was that their car was in the driveway.

They were laying in bed, curled up into a ball bawling. Cordelia suffered from severe trauma in their life, but they always tried their best to hide all of their pain. They had been dating Samara for over a year and has only shown weakness around her once. Not that it was a weakness, but Delia thought that it was.

"Delia, are you home?" They heard the door open and Samara making their way through their house up to the second floor where their shared bedroom was.

No, no... Samara can't be back yet...no Dalia thought to herself as they heard Samara come up the stairs. "No! GET OFF ME! I don't care. NO!" Dalia yelled to no one and started fighting the air as if someone was trying to climb on top of her.

"Cordelia!" Samara burst into the room to see their partner fighting off what appeared to be an invisible person. "Delia, it's me...It's Mara...I'm here... you're okay..." Samara said softly reaching for Cordelia. "Delia, what happened?" Samara sat on the bed and helped Cordelia into their comfortable position. She placed Cordelia in between her legs and had them face her and she just rubbed their back and tried to help them calm down enough to speak. "Dalia, please talk to me,"

Cordelia was in a full panic, but hearing Samara's voice they were able to calm down a little but they were still having a full panic attack.

"Dalia, name five things you can see."

"Y-you...t-t-the clock..."

"Come on Dalia, you can do this," Samara spoke with sincerity and confidence and Cordelia took a deep, shaky breath. "Three more things you can see,"

"W-Window, y-your te-teddy...p-pillow..."

"You're doing so great my love, name four things you can touch."

"Y-you...blanket, p-pillow, t-te-teddy..."

"Lovely, three things you can hear."

Samara took Cordelia through the entire process until they were breathing more normally.

"I-I don't feel good..." Delia mumbled softly and as if to prove the point Delia's stomach let out a low grumble. This often happened when Delia had such a severe panic attack.

"It's okay love, just feel my warmth and touch, okay?" Samara was so gentle with Cordelia, they were so lucky. However, as they started to relax in their girlfriend's touch, their stomach lurched and their stomach contents spilled all down Samara's back.

"N-Not done..." Delia cried, their breathing becoming more irregular as the panic of what just happened began to set in.

"It's okay my love, just get it all up, okay?" Samara just continued to rub their back while they coughed up the rest of their stomach contents.

Delia let out a few more coughs and started dry heaving, mostly from just panicking now that their stomach was empty. "Dalia, let's go rinse your mouth out in the bathroom and clean up, and then we can get you all settled on the couch, and then we can talk about your feelings, okay?"

Delia nodded and let out a nauseous burp and a moan followed. "You're okay love, let's just go to the bathroom, okay?" Samara stood up and pulled off their shirt and held their arms out to support Delia.

Once they made their way to the bathroom Delia washed out their mouth and cleaned up while Samara went back to the bedroom to clean up the mess. They quickly put everything into the wash and went back to the bathroom and it was perfect timing. "Let's get you all settled on the couch,"

Once they were settled together under the blankets, Samara was cuddling Delia and rubbing her stomach waiting for Delia to tell them what they were feeling.

"It was him again, I thought I saw him at the store..."

"My love, you know he's gone. He's gone." Samara cooed as they held onto Delia tightly. "Shhh, don't cry, they're gone and you're safe. Just stay with me right now."

[waynedunlaptheorgandonor]

for those of you who wanted to read the like, 4k words/chapter and a half of the “maybe it’s just us” sequel (i titled it “the road from where we been to where we’re going” in case you were curious) i started two years ago and then abandoned, here you go. i did not edit it, so what you see is what you get (not that that’s any different from anything else i’ve ever written in my life ig): 

Chapter 1

You are You

Carol

“I can't change her, she's doing the thing,” Daryl said anxiously over the sound of high-pitched infant cries.

“What thing?” asked Carol. Her body was spent; she couldn't remember the last time she was this tired. She was sore, stitched, and her insides were trying to remember how to take care of one instead of two. From over in the corner, Daryl had their daughter on her back on a desk that was functioning as a makeshift changing table, and from the sounds of it, neither of them were doing that well.

“That flailin’ thing with her arms. She thinks she's fallin’. Shh, shh, baby, it's okay, I ain't gonna drop you, please don't cry.” His voice was so tense and scared, and Carol felt guilty for smiling, thankful his back was to her.

“She's fine, Daryl, why do you think she thinks she's falling?”

“'Cause it's true,” Daryl insisted. “Glenn—there you go, lil’ one, we got that on you, now lemme just figure out all these damn snaps—Glenn told me about it. It's some reflex babies have. When they flail their arms like this it means they think they're fallin’. Sarah even said so, so I know it ain't bullshit—goddamn, why is this thing so hard to snap? Baby, if you stopped kickin’ your legs so much, we'd be done already.”

“You aren't allowed to spend time alone with Glenn anymore,” Carol said, as Daryl finished torturing their child (or was she torturing him?). She took Rose from him and tucked her into the crook of her arm.

Carol hadn't really processed it yet. This baby that had been inside her for the past nine months had been out in the world with them for hours now, and she wasn't convinced it was real.

From the moment she peed on that stick and it glared positive, to as recently as 24 hours ago, Carol hadn't allowed herself to believe that this could possibly end well. She was too old, she figured, too stressed, too downright unlucky. When Daryl told her he wanted to keep the baby, she'd almost been angry; she'd hoped he'd make the hard decision so she wouldn't have to, and when he didn't, she found she couldn't either. How could she look him in the face and say, 'I want to get rid of it,’ when he had so much faith in their ability to do this?

And now they had a baby. In Carol's arms, Rose whimpered, sticking her thumb in her mouth and suckling. 

She looked nothing like Sophia. If Carol had a baby picture of Sophia—which, of course, she didn't—and held it up to Rose, she bet no one in a million years would have ever guessed they were sisters. Everything of Carol's that Sophia had, Rose had the opposite. Sophia had had Carol's eyes; Rose had Daryl's. Sophia had had Ed's nose; Rose had hers. There was nothing familiar about looking at Rose, as Carol had both feared and hoped. She had wondered if meeting her new child would be like seeing a ghost, and she almost wished for it, if only because she wanted to see Sophia again.

But Rose wasn't Sophia, and she made sure to demonstrate that clearly. Sophia had been meek and quiet, even as an infant, but Rose was not remotely shy about letting them know when she was displeased.

Like right now, for example, as her tiny whimpers around her thumb turned into full-blown wails. Daryl tensed beside them on the bed.

“What's wrong?” he asked. He had asked that about every new noise Rose had made since birth. He was so much a new parent that Carol would have found it endearing if she weren't so tired.

Rose had tricked them. Just as exhausted as Carol, she had spent her first few hours on the planet in a deep sleep, lulling them into a sense of calm, even granting Carol a bit of a nap, but the second she woke up, she was ready to make demands.

“She's hungry,” Carol said. She'd attempted to get Rose to nurse earlier, but the baby had trouble latching, and was too tired to try that hard, and she was paying for it now, clearly having woken up with an empty belly. Carol maneuvered herself so she could offer her breast to Rose. She moved Rose's hand out of the way, and tried to get her to seek out Carol on her own, but instead she just cried and brought her thumb back to her mouth.

“You can't eat and suck your thumb at the same time,” Carol said, trying not to get frustrated. 

When Sophia was born, she had rested on Carol's chest, skin-to-skin, and had latched perfectly on her own within the hour, and it had been a precious bonding moment—a precious bonding moment that Rose was adamantly refusing to have, despite her obvious hunger.

“C'mon kid, this ain't a five star restaurant, you don't get to be choosey,” Daryl said, rubbing Rose's back. Rose screamed bloody murder in response.

“It's right there, if you'd stop crying long enough to see it,” Carol said, trying and failing to not think about how Sophia had snuggled in close to her and had let Carol stroke her hand while she nursed. She had needed her mother right away, so why was Rose fighting her?

After several more minutes of this, Carol was getting overwhelmed. She thrust Rose at Daryl, who took her instinctively, and said, “Take her, please just take her, I need a minute.” She pressed the palms of her hands to her eyes and willed herself not to cry.

“Hey, you okay?” Daryl asked, adjusting Rose in his arms so that he could lean over and put a hand on Carol's shoulder. 

“Fine, I'm just tired and wish she'd eat,” Carol said, not uncovering her eyes.

“It's just new to her, she'll get the hang of it,” Daryl insisted. Carol dropped her hands and, looking at him helplessly, said,

“It was never hard with Sophia,” and maybe it was months worth of worry coming to a head, maybe it was exhaustion, maybe it was hormones and frustration, or maybe it was the fact that she had been trying to pretend like this wasn't bringing all her grief back to surface, but Carol burst into tears; genuine tears, big, wet, and rolling down her face, and poor Daryl, bless him, was caught between his daughter and his girlfriend, as they both sobbed inconsolably.

“Shit,” Carol heard Daryl mutter. He pulled her to him, and she let him. He wrapped an arm around her tight, and allowed her to bury her face in his shoulder and bawl. 

“I'm sorry, I'm sorry,” Carol said over and over, voice muffled. She wasn't sure if she was apologizing to Daryl for breaking down, or to Rose for being so shithouse at mothering already.

Daryl was muttering words of encouragement to her, while also trying to shush the fussing baby. Through her tears, Carol heard the door to the Warden's office open and close.

“Everything okay in here?” came Sarah's voice. What a stupid question, thought Carol. Yeah, we're peachy; the baby and I are just sobbing for fun! Ridiculous.

“We're fine,” said Daryl, as Carol tried to get control of herself, taking in deep breaths, but not lifting her head. “Lil’ one is havin’ trouble eating, and Carol's a bit... overwhelmed.”

“Do you need help getting her to latch?” Sarah asked.

“I know how to breastfeed, she just won't do it,” Carol snapped into Daryl's shoulder, harsher than she intended.

“Alright,” Sarah said calmly. “Do you want me to take Rose for a minute to give you a chance to breathe?”

“No,” Daryl said, sounding as harsh as Carol had. She wasn't surprised—he had caught the baby when she was born, and had hardly put her down since. Carol could tell he was reluctant to give her up even when he was passing Rose to her. His protectiveness had gone into overdrive the moment he and Rose met.

“Well,” Sarah said, sounding uncertain. “You know where to find me if you need me. Your friends keep asking for updates, by the way. I'll try and keep them away for a while longer.”

Daryl grunted something in response, and Carol clung to him, hiccuping, but not as hysterical. She waited until Sarah's footsteps went towards the door and she left the room before lifting her head up to look at Daryl.

“Hey,” he said quietly, looking at her with concern. “You wanna tell me what that was about?”

Not especially. What she wanted was to feed her daughter and then sleep for fourteen hours.

“Gotta deal with the baby,” she said.

“She ain't goin’ nowhere,” Daryl said, shifting so he could bounce Rose gently. She continued to cry, and Carol's body physically reacted to the sound, desperately aching to feed her. Carol shook her head.

“I'm just tired and got frustrated,” Carol said dismissively.

“Nah, it's more than that,” Daryl countered. “That was the first time you've said her name.”

Carol's lower lip trembled dangerously. She took a deep breath to steady herself. Of course Daryl would see right through her like glass. 

“I feel so guilty,” she said, wincing at the crack in her watery voice. “I told myself I'd treat her like her own person, and already I'm making comparisons. No wonder she doesn't want me. But I don't know how to stop thinking about Sophia.” She let out a singular sob, and Daryl reached out and wiped a tear from her face 

“Thinkin’ ‘bout Sophia don’t mean you don't love Rose,” he told her gently. “You miss your little girl, and you're exhausted, and it's bringin’ it all back up. Anyone would lose their shit over it, so don't go feelin’ guilty.”

Carol swallowed hard. “I don't get to lose my shit, I have to be her mother.”

“You lose your shit when you need to. I'm here to pick up the slack.”

“Yeah, well, you gonna breastfeed her, too?” It came out more irritable than joking, but Daryl smiled anyway.

“Nah,” he said. “Imma help you do it, though.” He handed Rose over. Carol was reluctant, not wanting to fail again, but Daryl was calm, and it made her calmer. She lowered the collar of her gown and presented her breast to her screaming daughter once more.

“That damn thumb. Just do that here and you'd be golden,” Carol mumbled.

“You're all tense,” Daryl said. “She don't know nothin’ about what you've lost, and she don't feel any resentment, but she can tell her momma's freaking out and it's freaking her out.”

“Since when are you a lactation consultant?”

“I dunno what that means.”

“When did you become an expert on getting babies to nurse?”

“I ain't an expert in anything havin’ to do with babies, but when you tense up, so does she. Look—her shoulders are all drawn up to her neck. She wasn't doin’ that when she was cryin’ earlier. You're her momma and she can feel it when you're unhappy, so we gotta get you calmer.”

An odd mix of affection and envy washed over Carol. Daryl observed and knew the people he loved so intrinsically that he was already picking up mannerisms on a person who hadn't been alive even a full day yet. Meanwhile, Carol couldn't even get her to do the one thing Rose needed her exclusively for.

“How?” Carol asked.

“Hum somethin’,” Daryl said with certainty. Carol furrowed her brow.

“Why?”

“You said all the time that whenever there was music she'd go batshit in there. Maybe she likes music.”

“Why don't you hum something then?”

“I don't do music. 'Sides, you're the one she needs right now.”

This was stupid, Carol decided, and Rose seemed to agree, yelling at her, absolutely red in the face. Carol sighed, and hummed the first thing that came to mind. After a few lines, Daryl huffed a breath of puzzled laughter.

“Is that Horse with No Name?” he asked. “Some lullaby.”

“It was on the CD you were playing on that old stereo when you were out skinning those rabbits the other day,” Carol said defensively. “It's been stuck in my head for ages.”

“Don't let me stop you.”

“Now I'm embarrassed.”

“Nah, don't be, look,” he nodded down at Rose. “She's calmin’ down. I mean, she's still pissed as all get out, but she's settling down. 'Sides, I like that song.”

“The others are gonna think we're torturing her.”

“Tell 'em it was me.”

“Tell them you were the one making her cry, or that you were the one crying?”

Daryl snorted. “Whatever makes you feel better.”

Carol smiled a little, feeling lighter. She leaned back against Daryl and continued to hum. Rose's screams fell to cries which fell to whimpers. She opened her big, blue eyes and sought out the sound of the music.

“Oh!” Carol startled a minute later, when Rose finally found her breast and latched on. She turned to Daryl in awe. “How'd you know that would work?”

Daryl shrugged.

“I know her,” he said simply. “You do, too, you just got other shit to deal with that makes it harder. Don't you worry, though, I still don't know half the shit I should. You'll be helpin’ me next.”

“That's how it's supposed to be, I think,” Carol said quietly, the room suddenly unfamiliar without the ringing of Rose’s cries. “A partnership. I never had that before.” She ran a hand over the top of Rose's soft head, which was covered in thin, red hair. Now that she accepted it, the baby was now eating like she was famished, and Carol couldn't help but laugh.

“You think she's gonna be this stubborn forever?” Daryl asked.

“You're the one who knows her, you tell me.”

“Nah,” Daryl said, grinning. “She won't be this stubborn. Being part me and part you? She's only gonna get worse.”

*

Daryl was finally asleep. Carol was beginning to think he was going to try and just stay up forever, for fear of missing a single moment of Rose's life, and frankly, if anyone could pull that off, it'd be him, but alas, it seemed his body finally got the better of him. He was curled on his side, breathing lightly though his mouth, one hand touching Carol's thigh, as though, even in sleep, he had to make sure she and Rose were within reach. She'd have to address that eventually, before his protectiveness got smothering, but for now she appreciated it. It felt nice to be so deeply loved.

Unlike her father, Rose was not asleep, but she wasn't fussing, either. She was alert in Carol's arms, taking it all in. Carol watched her, trying to see the things Daryl saw. Mostly, she just thought about how difficult it was gonna be to wean her from thumb sucking, since Rose seemed to have some magnetic attachment to the damn thing.

It hurt more than she wanted to admit, having Rose and not having Sophia, and as much as Daryl tried to tell her otherwise, she felt crushing guilt, because Rose didn't deserve to live in the shadow of a ghost. Carol loved this new little girl so much. She was bright-eyed and beautiful, and Carol could see the subtle hints of Daryl in her facial expressions already, and that was both heartwarming and hilarious, to see a newborn look so grumpy.

But Sophia refused to leave Carol alone—she lingered, haunting her with memories of what she'd been and what she could have become. 

Carol knew Sophia hadn't been built for this world, and she was confident Rose could survive it, because this was her world; it was the only thing she would know. That didn't mean it didn't hurt, though. If anything, it only made the cuts go deeper still.

“I'm gonna tell you my biggest secret right now so we start this relationship out with all the cards on the table, okay?” Carol whispered to Rose. Rose's eyes darted towards her, and watched as though she were truly paying attention. Carol said, “I'm a little broken, and I'm gonna make mistakes. 

“You had a sister, and a part of me is always gonna be buried with her, but the rest of my heart is all yours. I don't want you to ever think I love you less, or wish you were her, because I don't, and I won't. I want you for exactly the person you are. But sweetheart, I'm gonna hurt sometimes, and I won't always be able to be the mother I want to be, but in those moments, you can't ever think it's because of you. You're the one who's always going to bring me back. You and your father, you're everything.

“I've made bad choices—far too many—but you are not one of them, Rose. You were a hard decision I will never regret. You are wanted, you are loved, and most importantly, you are you, and don't ever think I would change that for the world.”

Carol held a finger to Rose's free hand, and a tiny fist wrapped around it. They locked eyes, blue on blue, and Carol finally saw her new daughter for the very first time.

***

Chapter 2

Want For Nothing

Daryl

Cooing. There was so much cooing. Everybody was fucking cooing, and they were passing Rose back and forth like a football, and Daryl was going to lose his mind.

“Relax,” Carol said in his ear. He scowled. By the time dawn came, the two of them could no longer delay the inevitable—their family was demanding to meet the newest addition. Which, sure, fine, whatever, but did that mean they all had to hold her? Daryl's arms felt unbearably empty as he watched Glenn with suspicion while he rocked Rose to-and-fro.

“She's got your grouchy face look down pat,” Glenn said. “Good to know your newborn daughter is just as impressed by me as you are.”

That made Daryl feel a little better.

“I think she looks like Carol,” Maggie said, taking Rose from Glenn and cradling her. “In the nose and mouth, at least. Those are definitely Daryl's eyes.”

“I can't believe she's a ginger,” Beth giggled, peering over her sister's shoulder.

“How are you feeling, Carol?” asked Michonne.

“Exhausted,” she said with a tired smile. “But happy.”

“Sarah said the birth went perfectly; didn't need me at all,” Hershel said.

“All things considered, it couldn't have gone better,” Carol agreed. “But don't ask me about it until I've had a bit of time to repress the memory of the pain.”

“I didn't make it to five centimeters before I was screaming for drugs, I’m impressed,” said Michonne.

“How's it feel to be a dad, Daryl?” Rick asked.

It was the best thing he'd ever been, and he'd really like to have his daughter back so he could get back to parenting, thank you very much.

“‘S good,” he mumbled.

“Don’t let him fool you. He held a piss in for two hours because he didn't want to leave her. Did you know he was the one who caught her? I'm sure he's about to have an aneurysm from you all holding her, but is too polite to say,” Carol said, smiling sweetly at him.

“Ain't too polite. You told me I wasn't allowed to yell at nobody for touching her.”

“I was trying to keep that fact between us.”

“Mm.”

“Should we give her back now?” asked Maggie, grinning.

“Yes,” said Daryl.

“No, you haven't all had a chance yet. Michonne? Carl?”

“We ain't letting Carl hold her, he's just a kid.”

“Daryl,” Carol said flatly. “He holds Judith all the time.”

“I feel sorry for anything, walker or otherwise, that tries to threaten this kid,” Glenn said, running a hand over Rose's soft head. “Daryl is so possessive he'd rip them so many new assholes until there was nothing left.”

He was not wrong.

Daryl blew a thin breath of air through tight lips as Rose was handed over to Carl. It was a testament to how much he loved Carol that he hadn't already leapt up from the bed and stolen his child back.

“If looks could kill, you'd be obliterated right now,” Glenn told Carl. Carl glanced up at Daryl and blanched. Daryl, not realizing quite how murderous he must look, tried to rearrange his face into something in the neighborhood of encouraging. More than likely he just looked pained, but that was the best they were gonna get.

“Do you think Rose and Judith will get along?” asked Carl. He held his index finger out and Rose wrapped her entire tiny hand around it. Daryl's lip twitched up, just the tiniest bit, in spite of himself.

“They gotta, or it's gonna be real exhausting for them to live together,” he said. 

“I bet they'll be best friends,” Michonne said. 

“You and Glenn should have a baby,” Beth said to Maggie with a shit-eating grin. “Then they'd all be close together in age.”

“Maybe,” Maggie said, glancing at her father, who appeared a little conflicted, but didn't object.

“Judith and Rose would probably team up and pick on our kid,” Glenn said. That actually made Daryl snort. Glenn glared at him. Daryl just shrugged.

“Okay, let me see her before Mr. Grouchy over there banishes us,” said Michonne, taking her turn. She smiled a sad sort of smile at Rose. It was the same smile Daryl had seen both her and Carol make at Asskicker. It was a smile that read of bittersweetness; of love and loss at the same time. 

Daryl had been a parent for roughly a day, give or take, and already he couldn't fathom the idea of losing that baby. He'd known Carol had hurt when Sophia died, and he could hear the pain in Michonne's voice whenever she mentioned her lost child, but he never really understood how deep that suffering must go. Just the mere thought of losing Rose gutted him—how did these two women get up every day with holes that big?

Rose began to wriggle around in Michonne's arms, and started to fuss a little, which Daryl was quickly learning was her way of warning them she was about to get mad. Despite who her parents were, that kid had no qualms about letting everyone know how she was feeling, loudly and with gusto.

“Sounds like she's telling us it's time to let her be with mom and dad,” Michonne said over Rose's cautionary whimpers. She handed her over to Daryl, who felt instant relief as soon as Rose was in his arms again.

“She's hungry,” Carol said apologetically. “She had trouble eating there at the beginning, but now that she's got the hang of it she acts like she's famished.”

“We'll give you some privacy, then,” said Rick, ushering everyone towards the door.

“We'll probably go back to our cell later tonight. We've just been too tired to bother,” Carol explained.

“We understand,” Maggie told her.

“Congrats, you guys,” said Glenn.

They all said their goodbyes, with Carol saying them back, but Daryl was distracted. Rose was staring up at him with a pouty lower lip, and in that instant the literal only thing he wanted was to make her happy again.

“You gotta feed her so she stops looking at me like that,” Daryl said to Carol before the door to the office had even been fully closed.

“Like what?” Carol asked, reaching out to take the baby, and pulling out her breast in a way that already seemed habitual.

“Sad.”

“She's not sad, she's just hungry,” Carol said with a light laugh, propping Rose up on a nursing pillow Daryl had gotten back on that run to the birth center.

“She cries about it, though.”

“Daryl. Babies cry about everything. It's how they communicate.”

He knew that, of course, but he didn't like it. If it were up to him, Rose would never want for anything. He wanted to anticipate her every need so she never felt uncomfortable or scared or sad. He wanted her to be happy.

What a horrifying thought.

Daryl anticipated his role as a parent to be about providing—providing food, shelter, safety—but he never once entertained the idea that it would be up to him to provide his daughter with happiness.

“I don't know how to make her happy when everything except you and her is bullshit,” he said. Carol frowned at him.

“Daryl, I told you she's fine, she just needs—”

“I don't mean right now,” Daryl interrupted. “I mean for the rest of her life, how do I give her what she deserves? Even if the world weren't the way it is, I ain't never been happy. Not before her; before you.”

Poor Carol, thought Daryl, having to deal with him running his mouth over abstract fears so soon after walking barefoot through the fires of Hell to bring an entire human being to life. To her credit, she spared him of exasperation. As always, she showered him with kindness he didn't feel entitled to. She said,

“No one is happy all the time. If they were, then happiness would have no meaning. There are going to be times when you're going to have to do the worst thing you can imagine.”

“What's that?” Daryl asked, anxiety mounting.

“Sometimes, you're going to have to let her be unhappy.”